You know what I just realized? I have been basing my entire future on ME! Why is that? I mean, when I feel more spiritual, I feel more, what's the word, worthy to be a missionary. HUH!? I mean, according to my mood or my relationship with God, I determine my future? Why? Because I have to be in control!

NO MORE!!

From now on, I am going to completely rely on God. HE is the one who will determine my future as a missionary or not. HE will determine where I go to college and what I major in, if I go at all. I mean, He shaped the earth; why do I feel that He isn't able to choose the best future for me? Well, I'm going to go. Until.

Love in Christ,
All His own,
(:Emily:)

(By the way, if I sound like I'm going nuts, sorry. I don't know why I all of a sudden made these decisions. I guess it's because I dream about my future a lot, what it will be like to be a missionary and stuff, and often I get down on myself because I think I'm not "spiritual" or "strong" enough. What a laugh. I mean, God used Saul/Paul, and he killed people! Why can't He use me?)